What NOT to do before you move internationally.

Yes, I did them all... Do you not know me?

a roof with a view

I do get to live here, though, and it's not so bad.

Let's start at the beginning. I was mad, very, very mad at myself. I was also depressed admittedly for the first time in my life. This is a bad combination for making a life-altering choice so I've heard. At least three people told me to wait before committing to such a titanic change. Seemingly, it has worked out well so far.

To those of you who vicariously lived my saga on the facebook, thank you for your kind words of encouragement. My multicontinental journey was farcical as I did my best not to be that "ugly American." Although my luggage took a scenic detour, it all arrived within a week - nothing missing, nothing broken - and with everything I needed to feel at home.

In the spirit of "paying it forward," below are my recommendations for when it's your turn to move somewhere out of your comfort zone. (Alyse, you hear me, right?)

The "To Don't List"

1. Over-schedule your final days. Sounds super obvious, riiight? There just isn't enough time to see everyone individually, make every brunch invitation, or sell your possessions to the highest bidder. But I tried, and it left me with a bad taste in my mouth as I stressed during the events themselves thinking of the sorting and packing waiting for me at home. Of course, I made individual time for those who I knew would need extra hugs because I wanted those memories, too.

Possible Solutions: (1) Make a schedule and stick to it by throwing yourself a happy hour for each of your affiliated groups or, better yet, let your besties plan one big, encompassing soiree and tell people that's when and where you'll be available. (2) Host a champagne "fashion show" and watch your closest girlfriends try on your less prized outfits and pack your old clothes into Santa-esque trash bags to be carted to their own indubitably full closets. (3) Plan a staycation or slumber party with your friends who have families so the kids are included.

2. Take a trip to Nashville the week before you move. Go to Nashville, really, just not seven days before you move internationally. There is too much to do at home with changing addresses, paying bills, setting dates to shut down services, and maybe selling a car. Also, you can't afford to get sick, delayed, or otherwise distracted before the big move. Nashville is an electric city, I visited my 5th grade teacher Tom Still, his wife Lynne, and their pup Blue, but coming back to a half-packed and disheveled apartment was nothing short of overwhelming.

3. Move out of your 3-bedroom apartment the day before your international flight. Somewhere in the Rolodex of Suzy's Bad Ideas this decision shall land towards the front. Moving furniture to my friend's homes, meeting potentially stabby folks to sell goods on OfferUp, and attempting to eat all the food in my kitchen at the eleventh hour tried my patience and deprived me of precious time with my friends.

4. Shop for everything. Disclaimer: This only applies if you've confirmed that you cannot get the item in your final destination. I had a subscription to ipsy (totally recommend: ipsy.com) that I regrettably had to cancel, but the products I had accumulated would have gotten me through the 10 days of jet lag without having to stumble through a local store to re-stock my sundries. Save yourself! Example 1: I brought too many toiletries that my mom frantically re-packed at 9:15 am day of departure for a 12:57 pm flight. She was not pleased. I am, thankfully, down 17 items and have not had to buy any beauty or toiletry item since arriving. -Example 2: I bought new chonies (undies for you non-Phoenicians), bras, shoes, and tees suitable for the Middle East from H&M only to find that doing my research would have revealed that the largest H&M store in the world opens soon in Kuwait. Still, my properly secured and zipped large suitcase had weighed 72.3 pounds before reshuffling the items "I just had to have before I left," and I decided that I would, indeed, bring a fifth suitcase. Read: $200 excessive baggage fee.

5. Expect to be in control. It's okay to give in to the local ways of thinking, doing, and being. This ideology is an affront to my Type-A personality, but keeping perspective allowed me to calmly wait in line and clearly express that zero of my four checked bags arrived when admonished by the lost baggage counter attendant, "Ma'am, four checked bags for one person in Kuwait? Might that be excessive?" Indulgent, maybe. But I'm learning to accept what is not in my control.

6. Forget why you wanted to go in the first place. Self-doubt is your enemy. I sobbed myself to sleep the night before I left as I spent the night at my parent's house. I wept checking in at Sky Harbor with my five bags as the ticket agent proposed twice, telling me that I can stay if we marry. Mike held my hand as I whimpered during takeoff and throughout the flight when I questioned, "why am I doing this?" However, the only direction I am heading was forward so I cried when I needed to, fixed my face, and ran to make my next plane, twice. As expected, Kuwait is continuing to impress, Inshallah.