A Quick Kuwaiti Q&A ver. 1.0

Q: Why don’t you have your passport?

(submitted by: Ms. Kim Hamblin, retired teacher)

A: I don’t know. Well, actually I do know, and the reason seems highly suspect. I need a civil ID to live and work here after my Entry/Visitor Visa runs out. The government needs my passport to process my data. But, I imagine the government just doesn’t want me leaving on vacation for a booze cruise weekend in Dubai.

Q: Does this make you “undocumented”?

(logical follow-up)

A: Technically, yes. Now I know what some of my PUHSD students must have felt/feel like. Also, Fun Fact: I found out that one cannot purchase or own a Chevy Silverado if you are not a native male Kuwaiti.

Q: So, with all of your qualifications and achievements, you’re teaching middle school social studies? (submitted by: every professional contact I’ve ever known)

A: That is correct. It’s like pre-school compared to AP. It’s quite strange, and they never stop talking. "Miss Suzanne, my dad’s mum, well my grandmother, had a birthday party, and I ate cake." "Don't care." These kids drain my entire life force.

Q: When are you coming back to Arizona to visit? (submitted by: no one, really… I just wanted to inform you why it’s hard to return on vacation)

A: When my contract is over? Experts say that there is one day of jet lag for every time zone you cross in your journey. 10 hours difference = 10 days (because math). Everybody: just meet me in Europe.

Q: How’s the single life? (submitted by: my mom)

A: Come on, you know I’ve met many men. One guy went to ASU and tried to connect with me about escapades on Mill Avenue; don't remind me. Another man attended "Burning Man" and talked about champagne breakfasts; don't make me jealous. Guys honk at me from their cars and taxis frequently. But nothing yet; plus, I don't want to have to change the name of my blog...

ridiculously tasty

Q: The hell is that? (submitted by: CrossFit Dave, Floor 4)

A: "Special Juice" - a mixture of avocado, fresh fruit, cheesecake particles, chocolate syrup & vanilla ice cream. I told them to hold the whipped cream. I request this as my last meal should I ever find myself in a situation that requires such balderdash.

Q: Does this make Kuwait the most obese country in the world? (submitted by: Suzanne Vogt)

A: Results pending. I was in Malta in July, and my friend Mario said that the Maltese are, but my other Maltin friend Alex denied that claim. My slapdash Kuwaiti internet research says Kuwait is 3rd, 4th or 6th, and these studies use different metrics. Whatever, go check out my darling friend Haleigh Colorado's blog about her eating her way through Kuwait and draw your own conclusion, you scientist you:

https://we-are-eastbound.blog/

PS - Malta was tied for 44th when I even found it on a list =)